"Survivor Outlook" shares the voices of survivors of suicide loss whose experiences with grief and recovery have been reported in the news. To learn more about the survivors quoted, follow the links to the complete stories. Learn how you can suggest a story.

"I call his name, three times, by the steps, and I didn't heard anything, and that's when I went downstairs. The TV was off and -- that's how I found my son. He was gone. It is a horrible feeling when you hold your child's hand, and you can't do anything to save them." Angela Wesener, mother of Jonathan Wesener, 16, who died by suicide in May. (Appleton Post-Crescent, Wisconsin)

"We all have the most innate desire to survive. Thats our core need on the planet is to live, and when someone gets to the point that they take their own life ... that shows what hopelessness really feels like." Ganel-Lyn Condie, Lehi, Utah, sister of Meggan Killough, who died by suicide in 2014 at age 40 (Seth Adam Smith's "Keep Moving Forward" blog)

"At times it feels like forever. At times it feels like just yesterday." Shelley Davies, Alberta, Canada, whose son Keenan died by suicide in 2014 at age 22. (EMS World)

"Murderers can at least be questioned, but a suicide is a murder in which the killer is also the victim: in which the reason, the motive, dies with the act." Jeremy Gavron, son of Hannah Gavron, who died by suicide in 1965 at age 29 (The Guardian, U.K. -- also see A Woman on the Edge of Time)

"Connor, Will [Trautwein], Robin Williams -- they died of an illness, just as people die of cancer and heart disease ... It is common. It is treatable. It is curable. And it is ok. The stigma needs to go away. People need to talk about it." Erin Ball, mother of Connor, who died by suicide in 2011 when was 14 (WMUR, Manchester, N.H.)

"Suicide grief is so complicated. It's a very physical pain. It affects every cell in your body." Grace Young, mother of Jack Young Jr., who died by suicide in 2007 at age 27. (Hartford Courant, Conn.)

A recently posted essay (you may download it here) argues that some aspects of suicide are inexplicable and suggests that if survivors of suicide loss who are struggling with the question "Why?" can embrace "the element of mystery as being as real as any other aspect of what [suicide] is all about," they might increase their "understanding and peace of mind by some measure."

Here are some of the observations that I claim "illustrate vital components of suicide that make this self-directed fatal act seem inexplicable":

• Suicide requires the person who dies to overcome the innate human will to live, which is genetically designed to be a powerful and even invincible force.
• Suicidal people, in almost every instance, are ambivalent about killing themselves -- so their behavior leading up to their death can be starkly contradictory because actions driven by the fact that they want to die occur side-by-side with actions motivated by the fact that they want to live.
• Before the person died, internal factors existed -- and perhaps also some external circumstances -- that only he or she knew about.
• In the end, the only person who is eligible to say firsthand why a particular suicide happened is the person who died by suicide in that instance.

The essay lists versions of these conundrums in the form of personalized questions that I hope lead people bereaved by suicide who are bedeviled by the "why" of it to a story of their own about what happened -- a story "based on who you knew the person to be (and who the person in essence still is, in relation to you)."

"I just wanted a way to remember him. As a mom, that's something you don't ever want people to forget, to forget who he was" (Lori Christianson, Fruit Heights, Utah -- whose 24-year-old son died by suicide in January -- referring to the "Brake the Cycle" event that is dedicated to him).

"It's helping me let Christopher's legacy live on, and it could possibly help save another teenager's life or another parent the grief ... That's what keeps me going every day" (Janet Sutton, Killeen, Texas -- whose 14-year-old son died by suicide in April 2014 -- commenting on the new peer support group she helped start).

"I have to believe the state of depression ... is so dark and gloomy and like a tunnel vision that they really don't think or see beyond that. They don't see the pain they'll be inflicting." Janine Harris, Sioux Falls, SD, lost her 20-year-old daughter, Nicole, to suicide in 2005.

"That's the terrible thing about suicide, is there's no closure." Marie Osmond, Provo, UT, lost her 18-year-old son, Michael, to suicide in 2010.

"All I remember of her is in a soft blue dress, sealed away in a stiff coffin. Her absence has marked my life ever since -- from the comforting of my cousin in the missingness of her mother to the haunting images of her death." Leslie Lamb, who blogs at lesliealamb.com, lost her aunt (who was pregnant when she died) to suicide when Leslie was four years old.

"There was nothing I wouldn't have done or given to see you happy and at peace ... Your presence is very, very missed. Every day something happens where you should be there, and you're not." Cherrie Cran, at a support group meeting in Brisbane, Australia, speaking as if to her son Bede, who died by suicide at age 19.

"You're left with so many questions, the whys and the hows, and why didn't he call me?" Danna McGill, Washington state, lost her best friend to suicide in 2008.